Embracing Your Humanity (Through Energy Leadership) with Tina Unrue

business woman change energetic leadership finding happiness happy place life coach passionate woman personality tests stress reliever working mom

What is the purpose of personality tests? It's to know ourselves deeply, maybe, or to see if we are compatible with a job or a person. Or better yet to determine our strengths and weaknesses. But what if the result of the test you got, doesn't add up? I'm not like this! You say to yourself. Well what are you, or rather what do you want to be?

Tina Unrue is a Selfish Mama! Because she chose to live the life she loved. She is a life coach for working moms and is passionate about 2 things, first, positively influencing her daughter as she grows up, and second which is to help other mommas find their happy place! Hear her story on how she can make your life better as she returns in the podcast.

 

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Here are so follow up questions I got to ask!

How/why did you start your business? 
Because my government job felt like a slow death. I had a baby girl at home I wanted to spend more time with and I lacked a sense of work/life balance. Long answer: I became a mom to a 2.5-pound baby girl in 2009. She was delivered three months premature. Although I knew becoming a mom meant I’d want the best for my child and that I’d be her cheerleader and advocate until the end of my days, I didn’t realize how severely that would be tested from Day 1. The struggle to ensure she was healthy and grew steadily was obviously the job of the stellar team of doctors and nurses. I, too, had a major role of course; not only because I wanted to, but because I had to.

The struggle to find work/life balance after having a premature child was excruciating. I wanted to be with her all the time, but couldn’t afford to stay home. So I became immensely resentful of my job. I blamed it for my limited time with my daughter. I blamed it for adding stress to my life. I blamed it for a 2+ hour commute each day that only contributed to my absence from my daughter’s life. Finally, in 2015, I became brave enough to identify the next steps for a new career that would allow me to spend more time with my daughter. I pursued life coaching as a career in 2016 and became certified in January 2017.
 
What makes your business unique? 
I think three things make my business unique. 1) I have my own program called ALIGN, which is based upon the five key tenets that I attribute to changing my life from surviving to thriving. 2) I am a certified Energy Leadership Index - Master Practitioner, which allows me to assess and debrief clients on their unique energy profile. It's similar to the Enneagram, yet is attitudinal rather than personality-based. It gives clients the freedom and responsibility to create their lives vs be defined/limited by the answers. 3) I guide my clients to assess their lives through the lens of motherhood. Motherhood is often seen as just a role, but it can be a very powerful tool as well. I challenge my clients to see things differently to help them step into what they want for themselves and their families.
 
What impact do you want to have in the world or change you want to see or make happen? 
I want to empower mothers to seek, believe, and step into their value and potential. I believe most moms, if not women in general, value the importance of external voices and needs above their own. We are natural givers. But when we do so from a place of expectation, exhaustion, and resentment, it further depletes us rather than energizes us. Creating a life we actually enjoy and one that demonstrates self-awareness, self-knowing, and self-regard isn't just good for us, it's valuable for our kids.
 
Are You Happy with your business, What makes you happy, And What Would You Change? 
I am happy with my business! I love supporting other women as they transform their lives. If I had a magic wand, I'd have all the backend systems configured and easy to use.
 
Did You Experience Failures? If So, What Did You Learn From Them 
Of course, I experience failures. If I didn't, it would mean I'm not trying hard enough. Some failures are related and just reinforce the need to keep going, to keep showing up, to keep trying. Other failures might help me realize something specific, like technical-, financial-, or systems-related changes that need to be made.
How Did You Handle Adversity And Doubt? *
I handle adversity and doubt by reminding myself that it's normal and part of the process. It's normal to not always be confident, especially as I pursue things outside my comfort zone.
 
Do You Plan On Growing Your Business? How? 
Yes. I'm developing group and self-paced ways to serve my clients, which will help with in-the-moment needs and at a cheaper price point than 1:1 coaching. Many clients deal with the same issues, and I'm working to address those things so that life coaching is more accessible.
 
Do you think self-love and trust are important in running a successful business? Why? 
Without a doubt, especially for women. I believe we all know intuitively what we should do and shouldn't do, what direction calls to us. We have to practice listening to and prioritizing our own voice over external ones. There's value to seeking tactical or strategic advice, but we should be listening to what resonates with us, not just the following guidance blindly.
 
What advice would you give someone interested in starting their own business? 
If the interest is there, honor the calling on your heart. Have faith in yourself to take the next right step. Don't allow the fear of not having it all figured out be a reason to keep you from starting a business. None of us can see the entire path. I believe success comes from believing enough in ourselves that we'll figure it out. Just one step after the other is all that's required.
 
 
If you would rather read the interview, feel free to check out the full transcription below!
 
Trusting your intuition will lead you to create a passionate and joy-filled life. Are you ready to get turned on to a new way of thinking? Are you ready to meet people who have conversations that speak to the things that truly light you up? What if you had access to a podcast that featured women, just like you, who shared stories that empowered you to let go of a lifetime,
to others' expectations and to start living in the now with passion and joy, I'm Jacqueline Rodriquez founder of your intuitive light coaching owner of enlightened styles, holistic salon, and your host of the intuitive light podcast for the enlightened entrepreneur. My goal is to help women recognize how tightly they are tied to negative thoughts and other people's expectations so that they can fully embrace and become the untethered CEO.
They've always wanted to be. You're about to meet some amazing women who will inspire you to untether yourself from any fears, the negativity that you carry, and become the untethered CEO of your life. This podcast is for you woman champion, warrior, entrepreneur, mother phenomenon. Hello everyone. And welcome back to the intuitive life podcast and show I'm your hostess, Jacqueline Rodriguez.
And I am on today with Tina unreal, which she's already been on the show. So this is her second time around, and I'm really excited to dive deeper into the assessment that she and I did together. And just talk to you about what that is and what value I really saw from it and why you should be looking into getting the assessment.
So without further ado here is Tina. Awesome. Thanks so much. I'm really excited to be here again. Yes. You're our first guest coming back for the second time. So that's super exciting. And honor and the reason you're coming back is that we had such a great conversation the first time, and you do these assessments with your business.
What is the name of the assessment? Again, the energy leadership index assessment. It can be a mouthful, but it is so well worth it. I promise it really is. And I think, you know, I want you to tell all about it, but I know when we were talking about it, I loved everything we were talking about because as you know,
I love the energy and I love how to integrate energy into our business because a lot of the time we don't think about that, but this is a really beautiful way to integrate that energy and see where you're on a regular daily basis. And then also under stress, which I thought was super awesome to know and see where I was on a regular everyday basis.
And then the under stress, because as a business owner, like we have a lot of stress sometimes, you know, we have different things and as a mother and as a woman and the laundry list of what goes on. Right, Right. That's right. If there's anything that women can relate to its stress. Right. Yeah. And what I love though is,
you know, with my teaching, like we want to take away that stress. I want people to live daily without all of that stress. And then when we do have stress, learn how to adjust our energy so that we can quickly get out of it. Yes. And your assessment was so on point, it was actually kind of scary just in a good way.
I don't mean it scary, like bad, but scary how correct and accurate it was. Yeah. And to see that was super amazing. So tell us what this whole assessment is. And so everyone can kind of hear why I'm excited about it. I would love to thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to again, so the last podcast we talked about pretty much energy and leadership together for me equals mindset.
So I just want to make sure we kind of re repopulate that for people, right? And so we all have energy flowing through us and we either consider ourselves leaders or not leaders, or maybe somewhere in the middle on the spectrum. And so the energy leadership index assessment is a way to measure both of those within you, which I think is really fascinating.
I think everybody is very familiar with personality tests like Enneagram. And we'll just settle on that one because it's just, I think pretty much the most popular these days. And while I definitely agree that personality tests are beneficial, I just love the Eli because it is what's called an attitudinal assessment, which means it measures your attitudes, your perceptions, your mindsets,
right. That's what it measures. And if you think about it, that's just fat. That's fascinating to me. I think it's just amazing that you can take something that's a theme that seems so kind of data like, right. It's something that you really can't quantify or measure, but yet we measure it. And so the Eli pretty much just measures your average resonating level of energy,
which means just on a day to day basis, where do you fall across using all of the seven levels of energy versus how you respond under stress, which is what you had talked about. And we all have to agree to the fact that we do not respond under stress the same way we do when we're not under stress. We all, especially as moms and as business owners,
we get the fact that we can approach something in a typical way. But then when we're under stress, maybe we lose our temper, right? Maybe we become very like closed off, right? Maybe we respond in a way that we tend to wish we hadn't, you know what I mean? And you know that it's not your normal emo. So,
I just love the fact that this assessment measures your attitudes, not just your personality and it gives you the ability to move up and down the spectrum, which is what we're going to be talking about today. Just embrace the fact that we are humans and we're complex, we don't fit in a box. So you're not always in Enneagram eight or two,
right? Yes. Cause that's what I love. And I would have to agree because I'll be honest when we, when you set up or you told me about the assessment, my first thought was, okay, this is another person, personality assessment, like, cool. I'll do it. We're you know, and I told you this when we did the,
we did the followup, right? Yeah. But when I got it and I saw that this was something completely different and that it really measured me, how I act, how my energy is daily. I was just so enthralled with the whole process. And I thought it was so cool because it was so accurate. And when you see the graph and you see how things are measured out,
and then with you going over the assessment with us and telling us like, cause my first immediate response to it, which I told you was to that's where my brain. So for all the followers. And so, you know what I'm talking about, my levels, like my day to day level was, Oh gosh, now I can't remember. I have your sheet.
Yeah. Okay, great. I'm glad I won't show it here. But what she's talking about is the fact that you have, we give you a report that shows you what your average resonating level is and how it's allocated across all the seven levels of energy. And so your longest bars, in essence, for your average resonating level, were at levels six was your highest.
So you had 20, a little over 20% in that one and level five, which was at 19.8. So they were almost like neck and neck. But the two that you were referencing was the longest bar, which means your predominant amount of energy under stress. And that was at 28.9%. Yes. And that was the immediate one that I looked at.
And I'm like, what? No, that's not okay. That's not how I want to resonate or come across. But it was under stress. That's right. You had very little, very, you had less than 10% of your average day today. That's awesome. And that is what was cool about you going through everything with us is showing how,
just because how you deal with things when you're under stress, doesn't define you. Right. And that was the big clue for me when, when you went over everything and then gave me the overall yeah. How I'm very high. And the way I want to resonate daily is how I am coming across and resonating. And then we got a chance to go over and find out why the two are okay,
and why it's actually very important to help keep you balanced and how quickly I'm able to get out of the two because we have tools to help us raise our vibrations. And now I'm aware of it, which also, you know, you give great tools on how to adjust that. And I just thought it was really fascinating that my, my mind automatically went to the bad and now,
which is really fascinating because I have a lot of tools to not do that. And I'm human that's. Right. And it still was my immediate response. And then afterward I was like, Oh, okay. It's all right for me to have some too. And it's, it means nothing negative. So I, I want to hand it over to you and let you kind of go through what those were and like how,
how you approach the assessment with people. So thank you. So yeah, negativity bias is a real thing. You all right? Just psychologically. It is a real thing, which means our brain is tuned into anything negative. Right. And we tend to kind of focus on it. And so when you were looking at your report and you saw the two,
you were like, hold up. Yeah. And, and it's always so entertaining to see how people respond to these things, because if they answer the questions, honestly, then it really is extremely accurate. And what I love about the assessment is that it can highlight for you things that are within your awareness, things that you are already, you know,
conscious of, but it's also very good at highlighting things that are in your subconscious or even at the unconscious level that are keeping you stuck or keeping you in a certain behavioral pattern that you didn't realize now in our debrief, you recognized it. So the initial thought of course was, which is actually kind of funny, right? It was, it was either anger,
which is lovely, Right. Validating. Yeah. But you were able to come out of it, you know, pretty quickly just like you are in life. And we talked about those different circumstances that show up for you where you were like, you know what, this is true. I do respond in this way. And you know, so the assessment itself,
just because it shows a predominance of two for you, as we talked about doesn't mean you're angry all the time or that you're angry for a long period of time. Even under stress. It could be very quick. You, no, it's just the initial space you go to before you start to leverage tools that then take you back up. Right. So the same was true for me too.
What, you know, when I went through life coaching, this is how the assessment is available to me to give to you all it's through our life coaching program. I did not realize either that it was just so amazingly accurate, right. I had to really dig into my responses and make sense of it. And I got coached through it. Just like you,
you got debriefed as well by me. So it's just very helpful to have that objective person listening and understanding. Well, let's put the, let's put the dots together, you know, where they can make sense. So you can see this. And the other thing too, though, is we tend to look at things. So at such a micro-level.
So, you know, for instance, you were looking at it and the longest bar was a two when you were like, what? That's not what I expected, but I had to help you see, well, wait a minute, you know your predominance. And we talked about this in your briefing, your predominant allocation, if you will, of energy in your day to day is 88% anabolic.
And just to help recap, and I hope we talked about this the last time in the other podcast, but you know, there's catabolic and anabolic energy. Catabolic is the destructive breaks down can be extremely useful when you need to fight or flee, right. We all have it. And so it is just a stress response that happens in our body.
It's natural, it's supposed to happen. But as we all know, stress is not helpful on a chronic level. And unfortunately, I think a lot of us are having a lot of chronic stress, which means we have a lot of chronic negative if you will stress hormones in our body. Right. But here's the thing. Anabolic is, is the opposite of catabolic.
It builds up, it allows you to embrace creativity, see options and opportunities and things like that. But none of the levels are bad, right? That's why I put quotes. Even though you all are listening to this on a podcast, you can't see us. I'm putting air quotes around the term negative for catabolic. Because again, I say it's useful,
but not chronically, right? We don't want to be under those stress hormones all the time. So when used in a moment of stress, when we need to be, you know, nervous, maybe about a test or nervous about being on camera or nervous about being, you know, giving a speech or something like that, those stress hormones can be very helpful to us to get through that moment in time,
you know, but over time consistently, it's not. So I want to preface that because the whole point of this podcast today is for us to not only talk about your experience, but to talk about how beautiful I think this assessment is, is to, and I don't necessarily love this term, but it's the one that I keep coming to, which is permitting us to be human,
right, embracing our humanity. Like we tend to think that we need to be perfect at all times. And I know that there are a ton of people who take this assessment. I included it when I took it. I was like, I bet you I'm resonating high levels, five and six. Guess what? This chick was not. I was, I was resonating at a three and a five.
And The point is, is that we tend to just want to hope right. That yep. I'm at the highest level because that's the best level, right. Or that's where we want to be. But yeah, we're complex people. We are energy, divine energy flowing through us all the time. And you know, that gap between level one, which is just very egocentric,
very me and it again doesn't mean bad. It just means very huge. You're in your humanness. Yeah. It's all about me up to level seven, which is the divine. That's quite the range to be experiencing here on earth. Right. And I feel like our March to our best selves, whether we're pursuing it through a business, whether we're pursuing it through motherhood,
whether we're pursuing it through a career, whatever it is, I feel like the March, our best selves is that it's us walking closer and closer to that divinity. Right. But we still have the struggle, of being human and having this mind and having emotions and having triggers of all these other humans on the planet. Hello children, hello, coronavirus,
hello, all kinds of stressors that we have. So it really does give us a broader sense of permission, in my opinion, to just be where we need to be and to choose where we want to be on that energetic path, as opposed to a personality assessment that tends to, I feel permit people stay in a box, just level eight.
That's just how I am to what I do. You know, I felt the same way when, when you were saying, and I, we, I think I even said this, like, I don't like the word permission because not that I need permission or any of us need permission, we can do or feel whatever we need, right. Or whatever we want.
But it did give me this sense of permission because of who I am and who the business that I run. I do feel like I have to energy, like stay in higher energy all the time. That's what people expect of me. Right. And that was one of those things where I'm like, Oh, I hope I'm, you know, flying high if you will,
in those higher energies. But when we were able to see that in stressful moments, like, I don't know anybody and maybe you've come across somebody, but I don't know anybody in a stressful moment. That's going to be at a level six and six is what, what was six months is equated to a kind of like a synthesis mindset, which means you feel like everything is coming together for your best.
Good. So all the pieces and parts, even the difficult ones are coming together for your best. Good. So to say that any human, you know, we'll default to that in a stressful moment, I'm not going to say it's impossible by any means. I'm not because I've definitely come across some just amazing people who really have been working at this for a really long time.
And they may, that maybe their default. I don't know, but I haven't, I haven't met them yet. Yeah. Well, and what's funny is that when we were talking about that and when we saw my graph, like my default in a situation that is stressful automatically is the anger. We also, yeah. Then, the anger and I can't remember the conflict.
Yeah. Which when we were actually breaking it down and I'll be honest on this podcast, like this is for me to have everyone see that anything you're doing is okay. Like all of our feelings are, are validated and okay. And it's fine for us to feel this because I automatically go into a level two in certain situations. And it's funny because I came across,
like, as I looked at the situations that have happened and I'm able to look at my situation with maybe the salon closing with coronavirus, I didn't go into anger. I was able to resonate more where I'm like, okay, this is happening for a reason. And I'm okay with it. So it's not every situation. Right. But we all have triggers.
And my immediate trigger and I was telling you, this was my family. I'm, we're so close. And I have a shorter fuse with that. And I immediately go into level two. But what you helped me see is that I'm able to also, it's like a dive in, and then I'm able to come right back out of it with using the tools.
So it doesn't mean that I'm just angry all the time or, you know, anything like that. But it actually showed me that it was a defense mechanism that would help me set up those boundaries with my family. And then I was able to set those boundaries and come back out of it and resonate a lot higher with them. So it was just interesting to me to see how not all stressful situations are the same energy either.
Absolutely not. And you brought up an excellent point too, that I don't want to lose, which is as women, I think there's a lot of discussion about energy. We know what it Means to Have toxic people in the workplace or the toxic friends, or we say, you know, Nope, that person drains my energy. Right. Or like,
if you're an introvert like me, right. Going to a big party is going to be like, Oh dear God, I don't want to do that. So, you know, already what you tend to want to stay away from versus what fuels you. Right. Even if you don't articulate it, you know it, okay. We also know what it means to think that our kids drain us.
They exhaust us. Right. And that's not to say that we don't love our children by any means. I adore, my daughter, but at the same time, it can be a lot. And can we just all embrace the fact that right now, it's still a challenge? We're still in a pandemic. We have our kids at home with us.
We have sometimes our spouses home with us, everybody's demanding the same space. We're not really getting out as much as we're used to. Right. We have all of these stressors on us. And so even when you are triggered, you might feel like going back to what you and I had talked about during your debrief. And you had just mentioned family,
right? There might be times when a particular situation, normally let's say triggers you, but then that same experience might happen, but you're able to respond differently, right? Because you're able to have enough energy to dip into your tools. How do I need to respond? I get to choose my mindset at this moment. I am not going to default to level two,
right? When we talk about the stress response, this is the way I interpret it, because this is how it works for me. And I think a lot of parents and maybe even business owners still will be able to equally understand this. There are certain times when something triggers you and you can feel yourself going through, how should I respond? What are my options?
How best to handle this? You know, is the client I'm going to respond to? Well, if I offer X, Y, Z, you know, will this end? Well, you know, if I handle it this way, right? You're literally, your brain is so powerful. You're going through so many different options within seconds. And you're analyzing all of it,
right? Even with your kids, when we get there, let's say that you encounter that client and you say XYZ, and you think it's going to land well, but it doesn't land. Well, right now, all of a sudden you might feel yourself getting a little more anxious. Maybe you're, you're starting to feel yourself, get a little tense,
right. So we can feel ourselves kind of going up and down the ladder if you will, a frustration or of anxiety, right? Whether it's our kids, whether it's our family, whether it's the neighbor, clients, whatever it is, we can feel ourselves when we're starting to like, okay, I'm, I'm starting to get frustrated because I don't know what else to do.
Right. Everybody knows what that feels like. So when you look at this report and you see your default stress reaction, what we mean by that is there there's no frontal lobe consideration happening. It is your default, meaning you just went there because there was no energy left. There was no sense of control as to decide, like what mindset or approach I want to use.
I have nothing left and my brain has decided it's going to do what it used to do. Yeah. It's going to act the way that has typically gotten you the results in the past. It's just going to go there and it's not going to ask you. Right. And that's just for self-preservation. That is your brain taking over from the frontal lobe.
The frontal lobe doesn't have any more control. It is just the fight or flight response at sane were, we know how to handle this, right? Because we can't allow you to use up any more energy. You can't expend any more calories thinking about this. We don't have it to spare. We're just going to the default. So that's what the default stress reaction is.
Right. Because, you know, we've all been there. I've been there where I've just lost my crap with my kid. And I'm like, where did that come from? Like, why was I so short-tempered? Or I lose it after five minutes of trying to rationalize and I'm not getting anywhere. And then at the end, I'm like, yeah.
Right. So even as business owners, we can get there. Right. I think we have a bit more control certainly with clients because you know, those are possibly people that we just don't have established relationships with. So we know that we have to bring it. We know we have to just keep pushing through that. Whereas we tend to kind of lose our ish with our family because that's supposed to be our safe,
loving spot, right. Where forgiveness happens. So, I say all that to say, even though we have a default stress response, yours happens to be a predominant of level two, but it's not only level two, but that was just the predominance. One of the things that, that I'm going to be offering to everybody is a worksheet where you can,
you know, have a cheat sheet of all of these different levels. And you'll be able to jot some notes down. And one of the things that I have on the sheet helps you ask yourself some questions about how you leverage certain energy. So for you Jacquelyn we talked about this, I think at the end of your debrief, but we were also running a little short on time,
I think. And so I just want to make sure that you know this too, even though your default is level two, and there is nothing wrong with that for anybody all, okay. There's nothing wrong with any of the energy levels by any means. But if you choose, like if you choose to say you would rather not have level two as your default,
how do you choose a different mindset? Then you will look at the sheet and you, I just recommend choosing the next level. You, you cannot necessarily choose. Yep. My default is level two and I want to respond at level seven. It just doesn't normally work that way. Y'all so my recommendation is just to try the next level up,
just practice with the next level up. So for you, it might be looking at level three and level three is the sense of responsibility, and it's at least responsibility for how you are showing up at the moment. So it could be, how do I want to take responsibility for how I'm showing up at this moment, right? And then when you think about that,
you can then set the intention. You know, if this circumstance were to happen, this is how I want to show up. And I want everybody to really get this. You know, we talked about the default stress reaction is it's how we have behaved in the past. It's how we behave when we feel like we're out of tools. It's how we behave when we're just frustrated,
right? Obviously, under stress, we have a certain condition that we have taught our bodies to do for years. It's habitual. So this cannot be today. You're a predominant level two and tomorrow you're going to be a predominant level three. It doesn't work like that. It takes practice. And so one of the things that I recommend to people is thinking about it,
think about it when you're not stressed, start giving your brain that tool in advance. I don't want to respond to this way anymore. How can I take more responsibility at the moment for how I show up? What am I willing to do? If anything, to take more responsibility for the stress at that moment for how I show up, that's just level three.
Right? Think about it. When you're not stressed, you need to be able to start giving your brain that toolbox so That when the stress does come, you have it to pick out of the toolbox. You can't just expect to read something like a meme and be like, Oh yeah, I got that. It doesn't work like that. And actually, that exact point is when we were done with our assessment,
cause I'm a, I do neuro coaching and I do a lot of the energy work. So when I was done with that, I said, you know, cause I do my meditations and everything, but sometimes we don't think about those things that trigger us the most. So I actually set up alike statements that go ahead and counteract that immediate stress response that if my,
you know, that my kids respect me, that, you know, we're all working together as a team and setting those things up when I'm not stressed and listening to them daily and actually changing my subconscious thought that brain connection that goes rapid-fire without me even permitting it, changing that because I'm able to see what those levels are. And I know that I don't want to respond that way.
So when I need to it's there and that's my automatic, but I want to change that and changing that subconscious thought and being able to see where you actually land, like when you're taking this assessment, I mean, seriously be honest. And that was my entire purpose when I was taking this. Cause I remember you said something about like, you know,
you'll get a good response if you're honest on the question. So I tried to be super honest on the assessment. And when we went through the debriefing, you know, I saw what my triggers were and taking those triggers. And while I'm not stressed while I'm not, you know, in the middle of the situation, setting those new subconscious thoughts to try to break the other ones and rewire the ones that are going to be more sustainable for me and create a better environment for me and my family and my business and the whole thing around.
But it's just this amazing thing where you get to see it all on paper because I like having more of the brain part and the creative loo part. And when I was able to see both of those laid out on the paper and know that I have control of where I am on the scale, just because I can see it. And now I'm aware of how I react And what my triggers are,
is incredibly important for all of us. And it does give us more of a sense of, we don't really have control. We all know that, but we can control how we respond when we're aware. That's right. And, and that's what I love about this assessment because you know, you brought up two things. One was, yeah,
you said, I think you might've said something about humanity or the data or something like that. And then the woo. Right. And like I talked about, like, I believe that that is like the struggle, but also the beauty of our lives is trying to figure out how to do both, how to listen to that spirituality. You know, however,
we attend to that, right? How does, how to tap into that, how to figure out what path we're supposed to be on, where are we supposed to be? How are we supposed to be contributing? What is our best self look like? But also managing that with just the challenge. It is being a human that I really do believe that that's what we are supposed to be here to do.
And so the fluidity that is allowed with this assessment, I think is just so beautiful. And that's the other part of this where sure. The default responses that we do that our brain does are habitual in nature. And they are for our best benefit because our brain has got to be able to conserve calories and energy for the things that matter. And we do something so consistently over and over and over and over,
it's like, I got this, I know how to handle this. Yep. I've seen this before. Right. It just does it. And that is when we're in the dark. We have no awareness of that happening. We don't think about what foot we put out on the floor. When we get out of bed, we don't necessarily have to think about the fact that we have to brush our teeth.
Right. We don't think about a lot of things because our brain is masterful at trying to handle the things that do and should be by the way on autopilot. Sometimes we talk about autopilot being this awful thing. No, it's not, it's only awful if it's, if it's something we don't like. So when we do gain that awareness through something like this assessment or from someone else's statement to us or observation or whatever,
it is just even our own awareness feeling icky about it. That's when we can do something about it. And so that's why I love the assessment because it really as we talked about, it's so validating to think of yourself as one way and then see it mirrored back to you in a report. And then also other things that you didn't even know about.
You're like, wow, gosh, that is true. You know, because then you can self reflect on it. And now all of a sudden you have awareness of it, which means now you have the power to change it because beforehand, if you didn't have awareness, you're, you're not going to change it because you don't necessarily know that you can number one and number two,
you don't know-how so. Yeah. And that's the beauty of seeing these autopilot things because with my coaching like we pull out some of the autopilot thoughts, those subconscious thoughts that without our permission come through and we can't do anything about it. If we don't know that it's happening like it's just that response. But when we're able to, and like you said,
now we have a choice. And when we have a choice, we have power. And when we have that power, we can go in and change those subconscious autopilot thoughts for us. So now instead of them, you know, a lot of them, like, I don't want to have to think about brushing my teeth or the daily things. I want those to be on autopilot,
but my immediate stress response, maybe I don't want it to be added to it, especially in certain situations. And like I brought up earlier with my family, I have taken those things that I tapped into, saw my triggers, and then I'm creating a new auto-response. And that's what I love doing with my clients is creating that new autoresponse and it takes time and it takes dedication.
But being able to see that especially when we're not just making a, you know, we feel like we're making it up ourselves. Like we see it on paper, the two go hand in hand, like just being able to see that and then have the power to change. It is such a beautiful thing that most of us don't get a chance to really see.
So that's why I was really excited to have you back on to talk about this. And I want it to be open and vulnerable and say, you know what my levels were and where I was resonating because I know so many other people can relate to it. And I want to give everyone like that permission to just be open with yourself and find those triggers.
Yeah. Just lean into the facts. The fact that we are complex, can we do not fit into a box and I don't want to shame anybody else by any means, but I'm just not one who wants to take a personality test and think, yup. I'll always be in Enneagram eight. Yup. That's just me. I wanted to change. I want to evolve.
I want to grow. I want to become better all the time. Doesn't mean that I feel like there's necessarily anything wrong with me right now. I am imperfect and I'm perfect all at the same time. And what, you know, what is my next level of perfection and imperfection? I just want to keep growing and my assessment or the assessment, I should say that I offer,
I feel just provides much, a much better roadmap. Right. It actually lets you see your potential instead of just yep. Here's your stamp. Yeah. And I will have to say, I mean the personality test, I also really love I do too also because it's, but if they're two different completely different beasts, you know we're one, the personality tests you're put in a box,
but really you can also use that to see, okay. So this is why I tick the way I do so we don't have to allow it to keep us in the box. It just starts to make a little bit of sense. And then when you're talking about in business, going through a personality test and when you're hiring and you're bringing on clients and you're bringing on,
you know, people onto your team, knowing personalities makes for really good teams because some personalities just don't mesh. And that doesn't mean that we don't want to be better or that it's in a box, but we are who we are too. You know, like that's just facts in our, our, the way we run. So having that type of assessment is really beneficial in certain situations,
but to grow and to have more control over how we react and how we go about our daily basis. That is the beautiful thing about the assessment that you do because the two assessments it's like, you really get a chance to really see who you are, why you do, you like to do the things that you do and how you work, but then you're able to control the energy regularly and in stressful situations and take that power back to actually change those auto things.
Cause in the personality test, you're just not going to get that type of detail. So I think there's always a place for both, but that's actually the beauty of expanding and being able to see all of these different tools that we can have. Yeah. And I definitely don't want to dismiss out of hand the personality tests by any means. But,
but in my experience with clients, they just tend to have taken them because they're popular of course, and they're very easy usually to access, but then they use it as a crutch if you will. And it's just, you know, it's not a conscious choice. Right. But they just then think, okay, that's that is me. And then this will always be me.
And I'm just like, Oh no, it doesn't have to be, you know? And so that's what I love, I think yeah. Both of them can complement each other for sure. Most definitely. And I definitely I've, I've seen that and I've been victim to the crutch using it as a crutch as well. I used to absolutely. Do we all have those things where we just kind of accept it,
but that's the beauty of opening up and seeing what levels we're at and just learning more and more tools? That's why I was so happy to see the difference between what you did. Cause you know, I told you before, like I wasn't sure what to expect. Cause I had a personality test in my head when I went to go take care of it because that's just,
what's popular. Yeah. But I thought this was amazing and I love that you offer this. And I think it just is such an eye-opening experience. So for anyone who wants to see where they're at on their levels and where they fall daily and if they want to start growing and changing those subconscious automatic responses, please take the assessment.
Tina is amazing and you just went over it, everything so much in detail that it really helped see that it's not good or bad that we really just have this, this power to change. Yeah. Thank you so much. Yeah. I'm happy to do it. I Peck the Institute for pro for professional excellence in coaching as who I got my certification through and their mission is to raise the consciousness of the world one person at a time.
And so that's really what I want to do as well because it felt like when I went through coaching, it felt like somebody turned on the light switch and I didn't even know the lights were off. And so it's just, it's amazing and it's powerful. And I offer the assessment even outside of coaching like you don't get coaching with the assessment. I just debrief you on exactly what the results were.
And we talk about how it shows up in your life and you know, that's it, you can always obviously opt for coaching after, but you do not have to, it is it's offered As a standalone as well. Wonderful. And like every other episode, I will have all the details on the blog. So if you want to check out more information,
I've got a download from you, the word cheat, right? So that'll be on the blog. You can go down, download it, check out the different levels and the questions. And then you'll also have a link to be able to take the assessment with Tina on there. So like every time it's such a pleasure getting to talk to you. And I really hope that all of your viewers were able to just get some great information from this and start permitting yourself to just be your human self and that we're all in it together.
And all we want to do is raise the awareness, you know, the amazing energy that we can bring to the world. So thank you again. Thanks for having me again. I appreciate it. Of course. Do you want to say anything else before we sign up? No. I just want to be able to encourage everybody to just to become aware of how they show up in the world and to be bright,
to remind them that they always have a choice. So even if something feels like it's just part of the job or it's just the way it is, I, I, I encourage you to ask a coach or a therapist or a counselor, somebody, if that's a fact, or if it's just the way that you think about it, because you could be limiting yourself.
So just get out there and live your best life. Do whatever it takes. I love it. And I challenge everyone to just look at the different sides of the coin. There are always different perspectives. And if we can just flip the coin on the other side and see what we might be missing, we might be surprised. So thank you again.
Thank you to all my viewers for being here. Leave us a message. Let us know how this was for you. What you got out of this episode, share it with your friends, anybody who, you know, might need this in their lives. We want to be there to help them support them. Thank you. And we'll see you next week at the next show.
Thank you so much for listening today. Please make sure that you go over to the blog and follow all the links for our guests and get the downloads that we talked about. I would also really love and appreciate it if you would share this podcast with your friends and family. And if you wouldn't mind taking just a minute to leave a review, that would mean the world to me.
Thank you again so much from the bottom of my heart for listening and staying tuned. Can't wait to see you next week on the shelf.